What in Chocolate Makes It an Aphrodisiac?

Valentine'S Day Chocolates Candy Heart Lov

When he first tasted this hot drink, he had been at the court of the Aztec emperor, Montezuma II. This beverage was a far cry from the ubiquitous hot drinking chocolate we have now. As there wasn’t any sugar cane then in Central America, it might have been sweetened, (if it was), with honey. Sugar cane wasn’t introduced in the South American continent before the mid-16th century.

Montezuma is reputed to have had a prodigious sexual appetite, and it’s believed that the Aztecs believed that this might result from the cacao bean along with the beverage. The evidence for the connection between chocolate and improved sexual performance is therefore purely anecdotal.

So, that is where the belief that chocolate is an aphrodisiac has its own roots. But is there any scientific evidence for this claim?

Scientists say that there are two substances in chocolate and the cacao bean which might increase sexual appetite; one is tryptophan, a precursor to the feel-good chemical dopamine. The next substance is phenylethylamine, which is a stimulant comparable to amphetamine. The latter material, phenylethylamine is discharged to the brain when people fall in love.

These substances are found in chocolate of all kinds in little doses, so it’s extremely unlikely that chocolate really has some aphrodisiac qualities. Dark chocolate has slightly more of these that white and milk chocolate, apparently. Scientists have researched the claims, but have found no evidence to substantiate them.

That having been said, however, most folks would not deny that eating chocolate, and letting it melt in your mouth, is a really pleasurable sensation. When we feel good, and are cosy and comfortable, we’re likely open to the possibilities of stimulation. If you’re not comfy and warm, you likely are not in the mood for any sort of dalliance. Think about all of the movies you’ve seen when a few lie in front of a log fire on a sheepskin rug and end up in each other’s embrace.

Chocolate isn’t an aphrodisiac based scientists, but since it makes us feel relaxed and good, there’s some circumstantial evidence to suggest, however erroneously, that chocolate is an aphrodisiac.

Friendship killers

Woman, Sisters, Siblings, FriendsCan you have”friendships” that are killing you? I mean, do you have the sorts of friends that you come away from feeling like you have to downplay your achievements or talents?
Do you have friends which are overly possessive? Backstabbing? Or, are you one of those kinds of friends? In this guide, I show the top 10 behaviours that are killing your friendships — and what you can do to be a better friend and have healthy friendships.
I do not understand how it works with men, but women are notoriously catty. Trust me. I grew up with a very jealous and competitive mother who couldn’t stand for me to shine. In actuality, she is going to be 75 years old in June, and she hates for me to be a confident, self-assured lady because she feels so threatened.
I also grew up with 4 catty sisters whose sole goal in life was to tear me (and each other) down. So I know a thing or 2 about jealousy.
How to Spot Jealousy at a Friend
You know your friend is jealous when she behaves passive aggressively by constantly making comments (put downs) about your boyfriend, your garments, your lifestyle, etc. and you end up needing to downplay your accomplishments and abilities so she won’t get angry or start being aggressive.
Jealousy destroys relationships as you can never be happy for the other person.
Advice: If you are the jealous type, ask yourself why you feel less than. Build your self-esteem by doing esteemable items for yourself and others.
If your buddy is the jealous one, have a serious conversation with her. Tell her you want to be supportive, but you can’t and won’t be in a friendship that’s rife with jealousy.
By the way, I don’t talk to my mother anymore – and I’ll only deal with one of my sisters. Yeah. It was that bad.
Friendship Killer #2 – Selfishness (Narcissism)
With selfish friends, it’s always about them. Everything has to be on their terms. If you don’t go along with their program, they attempt to make you feel guilty, put you down, etc..
Advice: You might just be dealing with somebody who’s unaware that they are selfish. If that’s the case, you want to gently tell your friend how her behavior affects you.
If you are dealing with a narcissist, you might want to end the friendship, as it will remain one-sided.
Friendship Killer #3 – The Manipulator
The manipulative friend can never be direct. They understand your weaknesses, so they hint about when they want you to do something, knowing you will fall for their manipulation – hook, line and sinker.
Advice: Tell your buddy nicely that you’d appreciate it if she would be more direct with you.
I had a friend who always put down any other friend I wanted to hang out with because she couldn’t endure for me to be with anyone else. When I wanted to include others in activities, she vehemently opposed.
Advice: Smothering someone –telling them they can’t have other friends — is a symptom of fear of abandonment. If it’s you who is behaving possessively, ask yourself why you’re so terrified of losing your friend. If it’s your friend who’s possessive, ask her the exact same thing – gently of course.
Then look for therapy.
Together with the critic, you can never win. At times you can almost win, but necessarily the critic will find something wrong with you or what you did, what you’re wearing, etc..
Being around someone who is overly critical is devastating to your mind and your self-worth. Individuals who are overly critical will always raise the bar just out of your reach. It’s a no-win situation.
The exploder consistently keeps you off balance. It is their way of controlling you. You never know what is going to set them off. Walking on eggshells in a relationship isn’t healthy and inhibits the growth of both parties.
Advice: Tell your friend to seek anger management, or you’re gone.
Friendship Killer #7 – Covetedness
Everybody gets a twinge of jealousy sometimes. But when it’s a constant in your friendship — that is bad. Coveting goes hand in hand with jealousy. But it’s a closer cousin to envy.
Your envious friend always wants what you have. The mentality is”there’s not enough to go around, so I want what is yours.”
Advice: Tell your friend you feel her envy and that it is uncomfortable. Tell her when she acts on her covetedness, you will associate with her .
Friendship Killer #8 – Disloyalty
God I hate disloyal folks. Disloyal buddies are the backstabbers. Gossips. They’re the ones you share a confidence with and then you hear about it on the 6:00 O’clock news. They’re the ones who laugh at you once you fall down – instead of helping you up.
Here is the deal. I don’t think people ought to be loyal to a fault. However, you should be loyal until your friend no more deserves your loyalty.
Advice: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
Liars annoy the heck out of me. You can’t trust them. Ever. And you can’t have a friendship without trust.
Advice: Confront your friend for their lies. Tell them that you can’t trust them if they are lying to you all of the time and that confidence is an important, and necessary part of the friendship.
Friendship Killer #10 – Being overly”Busy”
Relationships aren’t one sided. But friendships take time and energy. You’ve got to decide whether you really need the friendship because it requires an investment.
If your friend is constantly saying she is”busy”, it just means she doesn’t want to be friends anymore.
Advice: I’d see how often she tells me she’s too busy to hang out before I pull the plug on the friendship.
Conclusion So you wish to make sure you’re not getting drained by the very men and women who are supposed to be uplifting for you. This advice goes for any type of relationship.

Everyone has baggage

Man Luggage Bag Time Forward Piece Of BaggWho doesn’t have baggage? That’s the only question which pops into my mind whenever I ask a girl out on a date. Well, we all do have some sort of baggage of our past. A number people have done some disgraceful things which we are not proud of and definitely do not want our fans to be a part of it. It may be anything, like this guy I know, he’d been in relationships with ten distinct women and now when he eventually discovered his love, he does not need to share a picture of his past life with his girlfriend for a fear of losing her. But that doesn’t mean that she’s still the exact same person. Surely she must carry this until the last breath of her life.
When we hit our 20’s, we are too young to have any baggage. In fact, we should not be worried about our dates once we enter 20’s. Rather I should say young 20’s is the time once we start gathering it to the future. But when we enter 30’s, we’re full of it. We always tell our friends if we meet a new girl or boy, he or she is good but… To fill this but we have lots of explanations, for example, she’s beautiful but she had three boyfriends before. She’s perfect but she is a bit old for me.
She is sexy, but she isn’t a virgin.
She is attractive, but she has a massive butt.
Is it possible to ignore the last of the person and enjoy the present?
Well, for one thing, it is not impossible for sure.
Some people today take their past and move on while others repent about it forever. It’s just a learning phase where I have learned to not to feel any difference between happiness and sorrow.
This shows he doesn’t care about the past rather he enjoys the load of it.
Now the question arises, how can we manage not to let our past affect our future or present? Well, it is very simple yet complicated in a variety of ways. The simple method is to move past it and enjoy the current life scenario without any burden of the past. The ball is always in your court, it’s just that you need to accept and appreciate your own past. The moment we begin seeing baggage as avoidable as other things, the very existence of it’ll get extinct much like polar bears these days.
So the trick to a happy life lies in being casual with all the baggage you’ve been loading all of your life. Don’t be ashamed of it, try feeling joyful. It is worth it.

Mosquitoes

Mosquito Macro Insect Bug Animal Parasite

Mosquitoes are bothersome, swarming, hitting insects, and some are carriers of malaria, yellow fever, dengue fever, filariasis, and encephalomyelitis. Mosquitoes can be distinguished from other Diptera by their fragile, small appearance. Females have elongated mouth parts and a distinct proboscis well suited for piercing and sucking blood. Scales are found along the wing veins and along the lower wing margins.

The sexes can be distinguished by the antennae: in females they’re long and slender with a few short hairs; in the male they’re feathery and plumose. Close examination shows the antennae to be composed of 14 to 15 segments. The venation of the wings is also characteristic for mosquitoes and is useful in species identification. Mosquitoes are especially attracted to animals and man, especially to bright light and dark-colored clothes. The females are the blood suckers and can’t produce fertile eggs without ingesting blood. It is postulated that the blood supplies the serotonin and epinephrine required for creation of gonadotropic hormone by the mosquito, required for ovulation. These subsequently metamorphose into adults. Three genera-Anopheles, Aedes, Culex-transmit disease to man.

Mosquito control
1. Mechanical methods
Wire screens for windows and doors. Mosquito nets. Animal barrier: Putting farm animals between the breeding places and human habitations would disagree mosquitoes (particularly zoophilic) from biting man.

2. Natural or physical methods (ecological interference)
Changing the environment so as to become unsuitable for the mosquitoe eg, drainage or filling of the breeding place. Shifting of water level, water current, PH.

3. Biological Procedures
Introduction of a natural enemy (predator): a fish (Gambusia affinis) feed on larvae and pupae; release of sterilized males (X-ray or chemical agents) which compete with men in character, mating with females. And resulting in decrease of the forth coming generation.

4.
Used those against adults (adulticides). Insecticides act on contact being absorbed through the cuticle (contact toxin ). These are applied as space spray with an insecticide, which induces immediate knockdown of mosquitoes eg. And also by residual spray of resting places of adults (walls0 with an insecticide of extended action (residual insecticide) eg, hydrocarbons as DDT and Gammaxane, Organophosphorous compounds as Malathion and Diphterex, carbamates as sevin. The dvelopment of immunity is a drawback of insecticides

Specific agents can be applied against aquatic stages. These agents are applied to water surfaces. Pupae are not affected, as they don’t feed. Respiratory poison: employing non-volatile oils suffocates larvae and pupae by blocking the respiratory spiracles. Residual insecticides are sprayed water surface mixed with oil or dust. They exert their effect by ingestion and contact. Practically no single method alone is efficient in control. The joint use of two or more methods (integrated controller ) would provide a higher and more efficient level of abatement. Insects escaped method, are murdered by other.

Treatment Of Women

Woman, Pretty, Girl, Hair, Beautiful

Violence against women in Latin America has been classified as an epidemic in the region, sexual abuse is one of the main types of violence, and the situation of women in the rest of the planet isn’t very different. According to a report from the World Health Organization and statistics in the UN Women,”recent statistics of the global prevalence indicate that one in three girls in the world (35%) has suffered physical and/or sexual violence of a couple or sexual abuse by third parties at some time in their lives”.

In the wake of the growing wave of violence against women, protests are arranged in various areas of the world, in an unsuccessful effort to stop it, particularly after cases are heard that shake the people due to their cruelty and sadism. And in those protests, you may read countless posters with phrases of repudiation of violence and support for women. One of these phrases that caught my attention and that I have seen repeatedly is:”We live in a world where they teach women to take care to not be raped, Rather than teaching guys NOT TO VIOLATE”… I was called to attention for two reasons:

Initially, since I saw a harsh truth in that phrase, since I was born and raised in a macho society in which it is taken as normal for men to harass women in the street, to inform them obscenities or to touch them impudently; where it is common for men to beat their women because they have”rights” to them in some areas of the country, women consider their husbands have the right to hit them, because they are their husbands, and they get angry if someone tries to defend them!!! It appears a joke, but it’s not-, and I think that to a large extent that the high rate of sexual violence against women in my country and in the rest of the world is machismo.

The second, because I would have liked to explain to the person who wrote that phrase that Islam does teach men to”not offend”. Moreover, before referring to the issue of women’s behaviour and dress, the Koran calls men’s attention to their behaviour and gives them a strong warning: Tell the believers [oh, Muhammad!] God is well informed of what they do [Quran 24:30]. This God is telling men that they shouldn’t even look at girls unduly, up to that level men have to respect women, even with their eyes! And they’re warned that God knows what they’re doing, even if no one else knows, God knows. Then, in the first place, God addresses guys and orders them to behave well and respect women; then he addresses women and requests them to act well and dress modestly, since Islam is fair, and teaches us that both men and women must fulfill our share of responsibility to make this a better world and live in harmony. So Islam teaches men not to rape because if they are even forbidden to look at women unduly, they are much more forbidden to touch them .

Islam has approached the dilemma of good treatment of women in a detailed and detailed fashion, emphasizing the special respect it deserves in each of the various stages it goes through throughout its lifetime – when it is a daughter, when she’s a wife and when she is a mother-, as we shall see below.

Respect for girls

Before Islam was revealed, one of the Arabs was considered a misfortune the arrival of a girl. While men were the cause of the pride of their parents and family members, girls were cause for disappointment and sadness; and because of this, they had the horrible habit of burying alive the newly born women. God categorically condemned this attitude and these crimes, saying: When one of these is announced [the birth of] a girl, the affliction and distress is reflected in her face because of what has been announced to her, she hides from the people ashamed and doubt whether he will let her live in spite of his disgrace or bury her alive. What a terrible thing they do! [Quran 16: 58-59]; and warns that one day will come, the Day of Judgment,When girls are requested to be buried alive for what sin they were murdered [Quran 81: 8-9]. In this manner God forbade this wild practice considering it a very serious sin. But also, but it made the upbringing and education of the brothers a reason to win the blessings of God and get rid of the fire of Hell; said the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of God be upon him):”Whoever has three daughters whom he cares for, provides them with what is necessary and treats them with mercy, Allah will make him enter Paradise without a place of Doubts”. Then a man in the crowd asked:”What if he has only two daughters?” The Prophet replied:”Even if he has two brothers.”

This is how Islam establishes the worth of girls from birth and provides them a place of honor by making them a source of blessing for their parents in this life and in the other.

Respect towards the mother

Islam commands respect and good treatment towards our parents but elevates the status of the mother over the father. Who’s the man who deserves my company?” He responded:”Your mother.” The guy asked:”Then who?” The Prophet responded:”Your mother.” The Prophet said:”Your mom.” And the man asked again:”And then who?”

The Prophet spoke of the respect we should have towards our aunts. He asked:”Does your mom live?” He replied no, then the Prophet asked him:”Do you have any maternal aunt alive?” The man said yes, then the Prophet said to him:”Be good and considerate to her” (Tirmidhi, Al-Hakim, Ibn Hibban); and he also said:”The mother’s sister has a status similar to that of the mother” (Bukhari).

Respect to the wife

Said the Prophet Muhammad:”The best among men is the one who best treats his wife.”

The Koran commands: … kindly treat girls in coexistence. And if something of them should displease you [be tolerant], it may be that you dislike something in which God has set a good for you [Koran 4:19].

Throughout the past sermon given by the Prophet Muhammad before his death, he said:”… Treat your women well and be kind to them, because they are the companions.”

Honeydew

Melons Honeydew Fruit Melon Fresh Healthy

Of all the melon varieties, honeydew melons have the most mouth-watering flavor. Belonging to the cultivar’s group of muskmelons, honeydew melons occur in numerous varieties like the Crenshaw, Casaba (from Kasaba, a town in Turkey), Persian, and Winter. Honeydew melons provide one of the best options for a fast bite, especially for people who believe in leading a healthy lifestyle. It was Marco Polo who first discovered the Persians drying honeydew melons to better their aroma and taste. Cut honeydew melons with seeds make an excellent snack. Honeydew melons may also be made into lip-smacking kebabs!

Honeydew melons provide a number of alternatives for your healthy diet. These melons are in their nutritive best when ripe. After a long and tedious research, scientists have finally come up with a solution to keep honeydew melons in their’sweetest best’. The solution is extremely simple indeed. All you need is to drown the melons in a water-bath comprising a special calcium-amino acid solution right after harvest. The calcium in the solution penetrates the rind to make it firmer and increases its shelf life. Thus the aging process of melons is arrested to a wonderful extent. However, growers need to be a bit careful deciding the time of choosing of honeydew melons. Once selected, honeydew melons don’t develop additional sweetness. Hence, a great attention must be directed towards the picking of those melons.

A little expertise is necessary to identify and pick honeydew melons in their very best. Merely picking up by its rind and colour aren’t always the safest options to pick up the right melon. Choose a melon that doesn’t have any soft spots. Shake it up from side to side. If you hear the shaking of the seeds, it’s perfect to be taken along. However, if it is early in the season, select a melon that’s ripe one of the bunch. If the’seed-shaking’ is not quite distinct, keep the melon in a kitchen towel for a day or two. Melons that are picked up before the loosening of their seeds will not ripen at all. So growers must be the careful when picking up their produce to be shipped to the market.

These small tips are highly significant to maintain the rocking flavor of honeydew melons. It is sweet taste blends easily to give an exotic flavor to any dish. Believed to have originated in France, honeydew melons made their inroads into the US almost a century ago and have been highly popular since then. With additional health benefits and numerous recipe options, honeydew melons are rapidly becoming piled to the supermarket shelves!

Eleven Hit Songs

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Bohemian Rhapsody is the name of the upcoming Queen biopic, named after the band’s most well-known song. Other movies about Wildlife Control music artists have used their most popular song for the title, such as Mamma Mia about Abba and”I Walk the Line” about Johnny Cash. Famous songs have also been used for titles of film concerts by certain groups, such as Led Zeppelin’s The Song Remains the Same and The Last Waltz by the Band.

In most cases when both productions have the exact same title, the movie has very little to do with the tune. For instance, the film American Pie has no relation to the Don McLean song, nor does Pretty Woman bear any resemblance to the hit by Roy Orbison.

Occasionally, hit songs have born such fantastic story lines they film makers have shifted the lyrics into a movie. Here are eleven examples of songs that were later made into movies.

Convoy by C.W. McCall
Kris Kristofferson was chosen as the star of this picture about a gang of truckers who use their CB radios to make a powerful coalition against corrupt practices of highway policemen.

The Night the Lights Went Out In Georgia by Vicki Lawrence
The Peach State is the obvious setting for this tale of murder, romance, and police exemption, based on the song that reached number one a few years prior.

Barbara Eden stars as the sexy blonde mother who gets fed up with the hypocrites in her small town, just like the main character in the famous song from the Sixties.

Of course the Tallahatchi Bridge will be included in the film, for it served as part of the chorus from the song about a secret affair and its mysterious aftermath.
Coal Miner’s Daughter by Loretta Lynn
Since the song was autobiographical, it made perfect sense to assign it as well to the Sissy Spacek movie about the country legend’s life.

The Gambler by Kenny Rogers
The made for TV movie, starring the singer himself, didn’t have anywhere near the success as the number one album.

Ruben Carter suffered from false imprisonment for murder, an injustice that Bob Dylan made into the biggest hit from the Desire album. Three years later, the story of the heavy weight champ was made in an unforgettable movie.
Tom Dooley from the Kingston Trio
Murder serves as the background for this folk classic, which quite naturally fit into a Hollywood Western.

Pretty Boy Floyd by Woody Guthrie
He was a gangster that Woody painted as a Robin Hood from the song, which twenty years later was developed into a script.

Copa Cabana by Barry Manilow
Rico and Tony become a fatal fight over Lola the dancer in both the song and the movie, the former of which has been far more enduring than the latter.

Alice’s Restaurant by Arlo Guthrie
Everyone’s favorite Thanksgiving song is almost as long as (but much funnier than)/the film itself, which appeared a couple of years later with Arlo himself as the star.

Reasons to Always Keep an Open Mind

Brain Mind Presence Mindset Mindfulness Me

Maintaining an open mind in your daily interactions with people is extremely necessary if you really want to keep moving forward, be it on your career, your small business, your educational pursuits or your relationship.

I’ve come to observe that it’s most helpful to refuse to close our mind or to prejudge someone or their motives even before we hear them out.

1. Reality could differ from appearances.

For all you know, that person seeking employment at your startup and whom you believe to have nothing to offer, just because of something you don’t like about their appearance could turn out to be the single most valuable employee you could ever have.

It is not always that people put their best foot forward whenever they must fulfill new situations. Some of us simply don’t know how to apply the principle of creating a good initial impression. That’s why you have to keep an open mind when dealing with people you’ve never met before. It’s highly likely that you’ll be in for a nice surprise if you give others the chance to prove their worth within a reasonable period of time.

Trust me, companies embarking on a talent-hunt, people searching for relationship partners, students in search for a fantastic school or adult learning center to acquire more life skills are known to have lost what might have been their best choices ever, just by dismissing prospects based on looks.

You cannot afford to make that expensive mistake.

2. Centurian Wildlife

No one has ever known it all. That is why we always have to continue finding ways and chances to learn and learn more. At times, we learn our most precious lessons from the most unlikely places, experiences and people. What is thought to be the best method of solving a problem becomes obsolete in a brief period of time. The knowledge you obtained from school years ago might not be that relevant the way it was in the time you graduated.

To remain relevant, therefore, you and I need to keep an open mind and stop being negative about the new developments going on all around us. The more we’re prepared to try new ideas, immerse ourselves wholeheartedly in new experiences and learn from those who may be many years our juniors, the greater the skills we’ll acquire to enable us to continue to achieve more.

3. Maintaining an open mind opens doors.

How often have you been surprised with a chance from someone or from an action you least expect to deliver? Quite a lot, I presume.

That door you never thought could lead to a success could be the one bringing great wealth to those who believed.That is a good reason for you to keep a positive attitude and keep your mind open constantly.

The truth is, there are many companies out there who still value open-minded and adventuresome employees. At a highly competitive job or marketing interview, as an example, odds are that those who display a strong willingness to keep an open mind to keep on learning are the ones likely to be shortlisted for consideration.

On the flip side, those who exhibit an attitude of being quite conservative and rigid with their opinions or conventional thinking would hardly stand any chance.

4. You will nurture stronger relationships.

No. I’m not saying that you should trust all manner of people simply because you would like to build relationships either for your small business or for career development.

The actual point here is that you can’t expect to have powerful, meaningful relationships with others if you’re unwilling to allow yourself time to discover more about their values and hidden attributes.

In other words, there’s absolutely no way we will be able to build closer ties with our partners or develop valuable networks with our suppliers or agents if all we do is prejudge their motives or actions.

And bear in mind, the more relationships you are ready to build by being optimistic and open-minded, the further you’ll be contributing to making our world a better place.

That is definitely a superb prospect. Do not you agree?

Steps On How To Make A Chocolate Cake

Black Forest Cake Cake Eat Food Cream Cher

The chocolate cake is one of the most common types of cakes that you can easily make at home. The cool thing is that you are able to make the cake for almost any sort of event.

For you to prepare the cake, you want the appropriate ingredients. The ones that you need include:

· 2 saucepans

· Heat-safe bowl

· 2/3 cup boiling water

· Spatula

· 1 tsp. baking soda

baking powder

· 2 tsp. vanilla extract

· Whisk

· Spatula

· 2 2/3 cup butter, room temperature

· 4 oz. unsweetened chocolate

· 2/3 cup boiling water

· 2/3 cup butter, room temperature

· 2 2/3 cup sugar

· Standing mixture with paddle attachment

How to make your chocolate cake

Step 1

Preheat an oven to 325 F and then fill a saucepan with water and bring it to boil. After turning off the heat, rest the bowl on the inside rim of the saucepan. You should be careful when doing it. Make certain you put the bowl just above the water elevation. This is to prevent the chocolate from overheating.

You then need to boil water using a saucepan on the stove, and throw the chocolate into it. To prevent the chocolate from seizing, ensure that the chocolate is still warm.

Step 2

Place sugar and butter into a mixing bowl and then mix the two until it becomes fluffy and light. This process not only mixes the two, it also aids in aeration which is very important for the creation of a light and tender cake. To make certain that ingredients are incorporated evenly you need to sometimes scrape the bowl down sides.

Step 3

Gradually add egg yolks and vanilla to the mix and beat them until they are completely incorporated. The purpose of adding eggs is to stop the batter from dividing. Eggs at room temperature have been shown to result to a more cohesive batter. When you get a good mix, beat in the melted chocolate.

Step 4

Sift all the dry ingredients. These include: salt, powder, flour, and soda. You then need to add them together with sour cream to the batter. The ideal method of doing it is adding 1/3 of the dry ingredients and 1/2 of sour cream. You should repeat this process until all the sour cream and dry ingredients are evenly incorporated. The reason why you should gradually add the ingredients would be to permit the batter to take large liquid quantities that create a moister and flavorful cake.

Step 5

Conquer the battery until it gets smooth. When doing it be careful that you don’t over-mix. You then need to prepare the baking pans using pan spray and then divide the batter evenly. Finally, bake your cake until it springs back to the touch.

6 Useful Luggage Accessories

Travel Traveler Pack Open Book Object Retr

Luggage accessories are a practical and convenient solution to make organizing your luggage or paperwork easier. They can range from the convenient items like travel wallets and packing cubes to those items that improve safety, like the security straps. Let’s take a look at a few of the most useful options to get ready for traveling:

Travel wallet

A travel wallet is a very convenient item for the frequent traveler with its capacity to keep items such as the passport, tickets and money safe. They can also include multiple tiny pockets that are great to hold loose change, pens, credit cards, etc.. Any pocket created in a watertight material will be preferred because it is going to be sure that the contents are protected in case of being caught in a rain shower. Additionally, they are still compact and light enough to easily fit in a rucksack or handbag.

Packing cubes

The packing cubes are a useful solution to pack clothes, accessories, toiletries, etc., in a bag without getting everything wrapped up. Alternatively, they can just be used to divide the space in a bag by placing the cubes down the middle.

Waterproof toilet bag

This is a useful all-in-one solution to hold a complete collection of bathroom solutions. They are typically spacious with multiple pockets and compartments. When in use, it will conveniently unzip and hang its plastic hook at a hotel room or similar. Also, they can make a very useful option for camp trips when it’s necessary to navigate to bathroom facilities in the dark.

Luggage security straps

The luggage security straps give extra reassurance in knowing the suitcases are better protected with less chance of being broken into. Also, they can be used to secure extra items onto the suitcase which are too bulky to fit inside, including a rain poncho, sleeping bag or roll-mat.

Money belt

A money belt that’s easily hidden under clothes is a great way to ensure the valuable items while researching a busy marketplace, rushing through a crowded airport, or comparable environment with tons of other people about.

Dry bag

A dry bag is a must-have traveling supply for anyone involved in outside activities, such as kayaking, rafting or simply days on the beach. This type of bag is great for holding a spare set of clothes, towels, muddy clothes, or moist swimming gear.

Ways to Best Match Your Colored Mirror Sunglasses, to Your Dress and Your Occasion

Cute, Fashion, Female, Girl, Looking

Are you excited about the coming party or date? You cannot wait for the day to get there? You can already feel the cool music thumping through your own soul.

Yes, and the savory aroma of tasty dishes also. It will be a crushing event. You’re certain of that.

But before you leave for the party, you should not just get to select any dress combination. You have to match-:

• the occasion to colors,

• the colors to design, and

• the design to accessories.

They will definitely whip up the vibe at your party or date.

The mirror sunglasses come in a dashing selection of colors. It would make great fashion sense for a stylish boho-chic to keep four or five different colored sets in your sunglasses holder, in the closet, to match to your beautiful outfit, and to provide suitable protection from other weather and day conditions.

Now that’s being properly prepared to rock the event. When picking the colors of mirror sunglasses to stock, the best advice would be, keep a color range that covers dark colours, light colors as well as sparkling colors. You might have shades of grey, pink, green, diamond blue and plain tints.

1.

These shift and darken on exposure to various kinds of light. The mirrored sunglasses will provide you extra comfort in bright sunshine.

2.

Imagine not having to blink or squint so much. The coloured mirror sunglasses will also cut eye strain and fatigue from squinting in sunlight.

3. Strong and extremely durable.

Polycarbonate lenses are more impact-resistant and will withstand most of the daily blunt pressure.

4. Fashionable frames.

The coloured mirror sunglasses really are a smart trendy piece. You can have them in gold or silver plated alloy frames that give a softer 80s iteration to your style cue.

So how can you match the celebration or date into the dress, and all the way to your

Colored mirror sunglasses?

Let’s go through the 3 best fitting tips;

1. Picnic.

A day in sunlight, calls for light colours. Avoid absorbing an excessive amount of heat by wearing light-colored outfits. Or mesmerize in a white bar-code stripped dress, with a sneaky slit for elegant expose of a bit of skin.

The gorgeous side slit, will also be sure you won’t have any problems sitting on the ground. This will add to the perfect touch of summer vibes and cause you to comfortable.

Picnics are sunny weather events. Splash on your dark shades of colored mirror sunglasses to offer additional comfort against the warmth of the sunlight.

2. Sports.

You can kill fashion whilst hanging court side at a New York Knicks game. Put on a funky hat-it to bring your soft petal looks together and it is the ideal way to protect your skin for an outdoor event.

Wear a great deal of accessories.

You can go with knee-high dark brown or black leather.

Then splash on your stunning pink or red shades. A pair of pitch-day aviators and cat eye coloured mirror sunglasses with red tints, goes nicely nicely with blue jeans and is good for indoor lighting.

Don’t forget a dash of crimson on your soft lips to match the pink or reddish colored mirror sunglasses. Now that’s smashing chic.

3. Dinner date.

Is the diner on a beach side restaurant? Is it an inner metropolitan dinner? Or are you going to be going to the highly secluded woody resorts? Your dress code must fit the environment. You can not afford to stand out and be so obviously garish. That would make you feel too self-conscious and dampen your conversation with your date.

For those who have great arms and legs, wear a short strapless dress. Yet do not go off revealing too much skin. It is a date. You don’t need to be fidgeting and constantly pulling down your dress. Concentrate on making most of the light-heartened chatter with your date.

You could also wear jeans, converse or apartments, t-shirts along with your hot mirror sunglasses. You can do apartments and wedges depending on the setting. That deepens your mystery as a well dressing hot flick.

Now remember, eye contact is very important on a date. It’s actually the unspoken reason a couple decides to go out in the first place. Making eye contact provides a great opportunity for soul connection.

So put on brightly colored sunnies that could allow your date to see through to your eyes. With a giggle, yes, make them make eye contact.

Slip on the lighter shades of gray when you choose your colored mirror sunglasses. That will just spark romance and set the tone for an engaging soulful day for both you and your date. The light shades are a seamless fit for the varied outfits that you might wear on a dinner date in terms of color and design.

If The World Was More Like The Olympics: 3 Examples

Portland Panorama Night Symbol City Olympi

Nearly every day, particularly in this first – year of the administration, of President Donald Trump, we’re confronted with real, and/ or perceived risks, challenges, and so on, equally, at home, in the United States, in addition to internationally. Obviously, the threat of terrorism, if according to some theology, or emotional issues, is real, and, frequently, somewhat, frightening! Every two years, either the Summer or Winter Olympics, are held, on a rotating basis, and, at these, international adversaries, come together, to try to win medals, based on achievements, without regard to their national strengths, etc! At this year’s events, held in South Korea, by way of instance, North and South Korea, have formed a joint, combined group, even though, the leader of North Korea, has often threatened the rest of the area, with devastation, etc.. Wouldn’t it be nice, if we could all, come together, in real life, like at the Olympics, and also be in a position to oppose and compete, in a calm fashion, rather than the often – vitriolic one, differently? Here are 3 compelling aspects, and examples.

1. Competition, but sportsmanship: Rather than threatening others with devastation and annihilation, Olympic competitors seek to do all they could do triumph, and conquer their competition, but end up, demonstrating sportsmanship, and a highest level of honour, and caring! If just, world leaders, were ready, willing and able, to pursue the highest level of national success, etc, wouldn’t this be a safer, more secure, universe?

2. National soul, and one – world: While there may be numerous individual needs, goals, and priorities, and a helpful, nationalistic spirit, etc, leaders must recognize, we share one planet, and for that reason, there must be a spirit of cooperation! 1 example, is protecting the environment, for the common good, and while many countries have come to understand this, President Trump continues to articulate an America – first doctrine, while denying, climate change science! You couldn’t have an Olympics, if any nation, decided, they were taking their ball home, and moving – it, alone!

3. Being the best, versus good – enough: Olympic athletes train, to become the best in their individual sport! They realize, one just wins a trophy, if he earns it, by getting the very best! Far too often, we witness federal leaders, focus on personal self – interest, and politics, rather than accepting good – enough!

If the world proceeded, with the authentic, Olympic spirit and ideals, there would be more, openness, to agree, to disagree! It’s up to the electorate, to demand this, of leaders!

Having Successful Financial Conversations When You’re Engaged

Love Ring Romance Wedding Couple Marriage

While money is a primary cause of marital strife, a recent Ameriprise study found that nearly seven in ten couples say they have good financial communication. Before wedding planning kicks into high gear, make discussions about your finances a priority. Taking the time now to talk through money things can create a good foundation for your collective future. Use the following six principles to guide your money conversations:

1. Open-minded. Take turns sharing your vision for cash management as a married couple. Listen carefully to what your future spouse says is important to them. Acknowledge your gaps and build on your strengths. If your expectations do not match up, try to find a compromise. Some couples sidestep conversations about money to avoid feelings of hurt, fear, anger or remorse. Creating a habit of frequent communication may help you avoid heated arguments, and can help ensure you’re on the same page financially before you walk down the aisle.

2. Honesty. Financial secrets can destroy trust. Share the specifics of your financial history and current situation in case you have not already done so. Your future partner deserves to know if you’re paying off college debt, or if you’ve made any financial mistakes in the past (and the way you have rectified them). Disclose the good news, too. Divulge details about savings you’ve tucked away or a family trust that helps supplement your income so you know the amount of where you stand.

3. Forward-thinking. As soon as you’ve shared your current situation and background, discuss your goals for the future. Be open about what your dreams are, but be ready to compromise. While you don’t have to agree on everything, having shared goals (buying a house, saving for college if you decide to have kids, retirement, etc.) lets you combine forces on economies and gives you a road map for paying.

4. Cooperation. To avoid any miscommunications as newlyweds, talk and assign responsibility for monetary roles. Is one of you at monitoring online accounts and paying bills? Are you enrolled in a retirement account and taking maximum advantage of employer contributions? Who will be the principal contact for your financial advisor, tax professional or estate planner? Two is better than one when you are able to divide and conquer financial tasks, but make sure that you’re both in the loop on key decisions and money matters.

5. Diligence. It takes discipline, but taking good care of these housekeeping tasks right away protects you in case something unexpected occurs. Several Actions to consider:

• Consider combining your bank account if it makes sense for your situation.

• Update or write your will and estate plan to reflect your collective wishes.

• Amend your tax withholdings, to make sure the perfect amount is withheld from your paycheck that you are married.

• Choose your wellbeing insurance. If both of your companies offer health insurance, carefully evaluate your coverage options and premiums for the ideal fit.

Like most things worth attaining, preparing for a lifetime of financial compatibility takes work. If you and your future spouse can commit to the same money values, it may help you create a solid financial base.

Typical June Gloom

Rose, Blue, Flower, Bloom, Romance

June in southern California usually means overcast mornings that change into mild sunny afternoons which makes it an perfect month to spend some time in the garden before summer heat takes hold.

Thin Outside Fruit Trees: From June, trees should be bursting with small fruit such as apricots, plums and peaches. The weaker fruit will begin to drop this month. Do not be alarmed. In fact, after the initial shedding, remove the smallest of the rest. This will allow the hardiest of fruit to reach their full potential.

Deadhead Flowering Plants And Bushes: Your rose and other flowering plants should be in full bloom by now. Remove older flowers to make way for new ones. Trim wayward branches and stems to encourage better density within the center of the plant.

Control Aphids: Everything springs to life in June-including bad bugs such as the tiny aphid. These bugs latch onto plants and suck the sap from fresh growth. When the infestation is significant, they can curl leaves and stunt plant growth. Tips: Remove stems with the largest aphid concentration and then shoot a solid stream of water in the aphids to knock off the remaining.

Plant Avocado Trees: Plant your avocado trees in well-draining, loose soil, level or a little over level to the ground. Don’t over water even with a young tree. Allow the soil around the tree become somewhat dry before watering. Never let it pool around the trunk. Flowers will bloom next spring, but don’t expect fruit until two to three years after planting.

Be Water Smart: With dry, hot weather on the horizon, replace water-loving trees and shrubs with those that need little water once established. A water-efficient landscape can include such drought-tolerant trees and shrubs as bougainvillea, California sycamore, California wax myrtle, acacia, manzanita, Catalina cherry or western redbud (with its magenta blossoms ).

Lawn Maintenance: Spring and autumn are ideal times for patching or replacing yards. Grass types that are best suited for southern California include Fescue (absorbs water well), Bermuda (drought resistant) and St. Augustine (durable). Good soil preparation with the suitable compost mix (based on soil type) is crucial to lawn success. Once established, add a layer of top dressing specially intended for lawns.

A Basic Guide for Buying Bathroom Vanity Cabinets

Bluestone, Redwood, Bathroom Cabinet

It can’t only increase storage in your bathroom but can add a fashionable touch to your decor. You can’t only hide any unsightly pipe work, but you could also incorporate drawers or cabinets for all those bathroom essentials. However, there is a enormous choice of vanity cabinets available, so you might need a little help to select the ideal option. Fortunately, here’s a basic guide to purchasing vanity cabinets.

What Kinds of Bathrooms Are Suited to A Vanity?

Bathroom vanity cabinets are available in a broad assortment of styles and designs, meaning that they can be utilised in bathrooms of all sizes and shapes. Even for those who have a smaller bathroom, you can make use of the potentially dead space below the sink. It is possible to fit a slimline unit which looks stylish and adds valuable storage space.

There’s absolutely no 1 bathroom style that’s suited to a vanity. There are units available in traditional and contemporary styles to suit all kinds of decor and personal taste. Whether you select an elaborate layout or the clean lines of a basic unit, a vanity is sure to be an excellent addition to your bathroom.

The size is possibly the most important factor for vanity cabinets. Remember you will need to allow space for the doors or drawers of the unit to be opened completely. Be sure to take careful measurements of the existing sink area and consider if you’d prefer a bit more space. If your bathroom is on the larger size, you could always opt for a double vanity unit. This will let you have two sinks side by side for even greater usefulness.

Recessed or Semi Recessed Sinks:

The first choice you will need to make for bathroom vanity cabinets is if the sink is recessed or semi recessed. This simply means whether the sink is flush with the cabinet top or if it’s raised over it slightly. This is generally a matter of personal taste, but there are some considerations you may not have given any thought. The first is how you often use your sink. If you are the sort of person who likes to get clean surfaces with everything tidied away, you are most likely to appreciate a recessed sink. However, if you would like to have containers and bottles around the sink, then you may prefer a semi recessed sink, since there will be a more defined perimeter of the sink. It may also help to prevent bottles from slipping to the sink.

Your Guide for Consulting a Tarot Reader

Fortune Telling, Tarot, Letters

‘Tarot’ signifies the’Wheel of Life’ and the tarot cards represent the image of the Universe; of human virtues and vices, fortune and death and so on. Tarot reading has consequently , been providing guidance to individuals through their life journey.

Tarot cards may look quite nondescript to an onlooker because of the weird images and inscriptions printed on them. This is because tarot reading relies solely on intuition and psyche. It requires a clairvoyant to understand what the cards reveal. Tarot reading is both an art and a science as with understanding and continuous practice, it produces precise and dependable results.

When you consult with a tarot reader, you must remember that the tarot cards do not predict the future and instead simply offer the possibilities your future holds, based on different perspectives of the present events. The tarot cards provide hints and ideas about what the future possibly holds for you. Based on these, you can opt to take the best course of path to follow, to achieve the desired outcome.

There are quite a few wonderful Tarot apps which are available online and also on the smartphones, which when downloaded, create tarot readers available to you, at your convenience and at the luxury of your houses; with just a couple clicks. While tarot reading with the help of tarot apps may not enable you to touch the tarot cards, the clairvoyants controller energies and internal senses to help connect you with the cards and relay the query even if you are on the other side of the planet.

The truth about psychic readings is that even when the readings are done while you are physically present with the reader, the psychics don’t read the physical body. They don’t base their readings while looking at your eyes or your own body. Instead, they read your energies and join it with the energies that they receive from the universe to give you an accurate reading. But only a genuine psychic will have the ability to do so.

Thus, before you download a tarot app, it makes sense to check the ratings of this app and of the tarot readers recorded on their panel. As soon as you’re satisfied with the credibility of the tarot reader, then go ahead and seek advice. The important point to remember is that, when you’re confident of the tarot reader, you must trust them and open your being entirely to them. This will allow the psychic to have full access to your own being and he is going to have the ability to connect with your energies fully to give you precise answers to the questions you seek.

Tarot cards are very useful to those searching for answers to many questions in life.

Foods to Keep Away From Your Dog

Coffee, Coffee Beans, Beans, Roasted

As dog lovers, we would like to spoil our furry members of the family all the time. Especially when it comes to sharing the things we love together. Unfortunately, not everything that’s good for us is good for our pets also. Listed below is a series of foods to eliminate your dogs.

1. Chocolate (& Caffeine) – Now even if you have never had a dog of your own you likely know that chocolate is poisonous to dogs. What you may not know is that this also extends to coffee and caffeine. All of these items come from cacao seeds, which contain methylxanthines. They should be kept far away from your pets.

2. Grapes and Raisins – This one might not be widely known, and that might be a consequence of the reason behind it being unknown as well, but grapes and raisins can cause kidney failure in dogs. It is ideal to refrain from giving both of them to your dog at all.

3. Salt – When consumed in large quantities, salt can cause pets to have excessive thirst and urination. This may result in severe dehydration and even sodium ion poisoning, so it’s best to restrict the salty snacks that you give your dogs. Some common salty snacks to watch out for can include pretzels, chips, popcorn etc..

4. Bread – This common table food may cause bloating and twisting in your dogs stomach. This extends to all kinds of bread, from chopped to baked. Also, when eating raw dough, the ethanol produced in the yeast may cause your dog to become drunk. Obviously, you don’t want that so you’re likely to want to keep all forms of bread from your pups.

5. Bones – Dogs are famously known for their love of bones, however, giving your dogs bones in the table can be very harmful to them. Certain bones like chicken and ribs are prone to breaking off easily. This can do damage to your own dogs throat going down and even choke them. The bones may also splinter off at any point going down, possibly damaging their insides and their stomachs. It is best to only give your dogs bones that were made specifically for chewing on, like the kind you can find in New York City Animal Control.

7 Of the Coolest Things to Do in Bulgaria

Bulgaria Prohodna Cave God Eye'S Cave Cave

Bulgaria might not be a mainstream tourist destination, but it doesn’t mean it lacks interesting things to see and do. On the contrary, this tiny Balkan nation has lots to offer concerning cool traditions, events and activities. Here’s a quick list of things to do this:

A dance with critters – Bulgaria is home to the rather unusual tradition of Kukeri. Men dress up as monsters with big masks and plenty of bells attached to the waist area. Kukeri takes place in villages all across the country from as early as January till March. The concept is that these monsters and the noise they make will frighten away evil spirits and ensure prosperity in the area. The costumes are very complicated and are spectacular to check out.

Measure on the embers – If you think watching Kukeri was cool, you’d be thrilled to see the Nestinari. People dancing on embers – Nestinari – is an ancient tradition, preserved in a few places in the nation. Watching these people dancing on the smouldering embers might make you stressed. However, know they are perfectly fine – they have mastered this art to perfection.

This is the type used in the vast majority of top cologne and cosmetic products. Roses are chosen in June and vacationers may usually join in on the fun. You should bear in mind that roses have to be picked at dawn to maintain their essential oils, so that’s one consideration for men and women who prefer to sleep in.

Hundreds of individuals head up the mountain to enjoy a weekend of live music performances and take a peek at various intriguing crafts and exquisite food.

Enjoy a different February 14 – You understand well enough that February 14 is St. Valentine’s day. However, that’s mostly a Western tradition. Bulgaria has been influenced by it and makes honour love on this day, but the nation also celebrates the Day of the Winemakers on the same day. If you happen to be in the nation on this specific day, you should treat yourself to a glass of wine in honour of Pembroke Pines Wildlife Removal.

Have a look at seven lakes at once – Maybe the most visited tourist attraction in Bulgaria is the Seven Rila Lakes. Climbing on top of Lake Peak is a fantastic chance to find all seven lakes at once.

Visit a place of worship of 4 unique religions – there’s a place in the capital of Sofia where four different religions have their places of worship co-existing peacefully. The place is known as the Square of Religious Tolerance, where a mosque, a Roman Catholic cathedral, a synagogue and an Orthodox church stand near one another.

Evidently, there are a lot of cool things to do in Bulgaria. The next time you are searching for a Bulgarian property, be sure to check for opportunities to experience these locations and events.

Does A Lie Detector Work?

Truth Lie Street Sign Contrast Contrary No

You may have seen the demonstration of lie detectors in movies. The cable of the apparatus makes a relationship between the lie detector and the individual being tested. The machine draws lines on the paper to help the professional determine if the man is lying or telling the truth.

According to the latest studies, the truth of a lie detector varies between 70% and 95%. Let’s now take a look at a few of the benefits provided by this machine.

Benefits and Usage

Since lie detector tests are rather popular, more and more people are beginning to use them. Nowadays, they are being used for social research projects.

Frequently, lie detectors can have an impact on the way the subject gives answers to the questions. While they aren’t used solely to learn the truth, they do assist document changes in the physiological indices of this subject. So, the experiments are done together with before and after interview tests.

It’s important to note that some companies also use polygraph tests. The tests are done as a way to screen prospective personnel for Davie Wildlife Removal.

Another common use of these devices involves the assessment of the statements given by the witnesses and suspects. Additionally, law enforcement agencies also use them to track the post-conviction offenders. However, it is important to say that the machines aren’t utilised to determine whether the subject is really guilty.

It’s interesting to note that toy lie detectors are also quite popular with kids. Interestingly enough, these toys are based on similar algorithm and may give a mild electric shock to the subject when he tells a lie. However, it’s important to remember that the results might not be accurate.

Negative Remarks

Polygraph tests are quite popular, but the results of these tests can’t be accurate. The reason is that not everyone will give the identical reaction in a circumstance. As a result, the physiological indices of a person could be different from another test subject. That’s the main reason this device is not considered 100% reliable.

Also, polygraph tests are not worth it. The machine may provide misleading results. As a result, they have to perform the test all over again, which will have a whole lot of extra time.

Moreover, the tests can cost a great deal of money. Apart from the cost of the machine, it will cost additional money to hire a qualified professional for the interpretation of the test results.

It’s Always An Argument….

Face Soul Head Smoke Light Sad Thoughts Mi

How often have we began a conversation with our family members, colleagues, friends with the goal to discuss, only to have it turn into a debate?

The whole thing just feels like a bullet train wreck – it is out of your hands, it requires a life of its own and people involved become angry, angry and all sorts of unkind words ensue.

There are many factors why this can happen. In this sharing, let’s keep a focus on using language to prevent an explosion.

This is what I teach my clients: Use the word I versus You. Owning our feelings/emotions/behavior and taking responsibility for Royal Palm Beach Bat Removal.

Whether it’s a work discussion or a discussion regarding relationship and household matters, some form of emotions/feelings will certainly surface. We are humans, and we come in little packages that include all of the good feelings and all the bad feelings. Sometimes, for some of us, our feelings (good or bad) are so hidden and stuck deep inside that they don’t get expressed until a discussion with others ignites a spark within. For some others, we’ve got no control over our emotions that they get sparked anytime and anyplace.

One of the keys to bear in mind if we do not need a discussion to turn into a debate is that we maintain our attention only on ourselves and the words we’re using. This is a certain guarantee.

Nobody likes to be accused of something, even if they did do it! This is just the ego protecting itself and needing to come up tops in each and every human scenario. So if we don’t need to put ourselves in a position where things get volatile, avoid saying YOU too much and more importantly stay away from the blame game!

Take possession of our own feelings/emotions that surface: I feel so sad, I feel so angry etc.. When we say what we are feeling instead of expressing the feeling in a manner that will come across as if we’re using another party as a punching bag, things will explode.

Do you see the difference between saying what you’re feeling versus expressing what you are feeling?

We say, I’m feeling so mad about this circumstance.

If we express this anger, this is the way we could express: Why did this happen? How could something so stupid happen? Why do you do this? How can you let this happen? etc.. .

When we take possession, we’re saying we are accountable for how we feel, and we have to give other people an opportunity to say what they’re feeling too.

Some examples:

I’m feeling so angry about this situation. I am certain that no one intended it to be this way…
I am feeling so angry about this, I’m not sure it wasn’t your intention to hurt me, but I felt quite hurt when I had been talked to this way…
I’m feeling so mad about this, I do not know if they intended to do this on purpose, but I can’t help but feel so angry because the reality isI feel so helpless in this situation…
The thing is using the I word will surely make us more emotionally vulnerable, BUT at the same time, in addition, it helps the other party to see their particular vulnerability.
So the next question a few of us may ask is: what if the other person doesn’t respond in kind but goes in an attack mode while we are being vulnerable? Stay calm and remain in the exact same position of owning feelings/emotions and understand that we have taken the greater stand in this circumstance. One person can’t start an argument, so if we don’t feed it, it is going to die off. A discussion can still occur if both parties have calmed down if not a discussion at another time is the best way forward.

Remember this: Discussions enable us, arguments weaken us.

Little Faith in Yourself?

Index Finger Pointing You Hand Me Accusati

“When you trust yourself, you will know how to live.”

Have you ever actually heard yourself complaining about how you can’t do something?

I have… and it wasn’t pretty. However, it was made for a funny story!

In fact, I created a demonstration based on stated humorous story and delivered it recently at a women’s networking event. The conversation was well-received (and everybody laughed at the funny part) but I rather surprised myself at the question and answer period afterwards.

My presentation was called,”The Electric Jello Story – Turning I Can’t Into I Could… and I Will.”

The first part of my talk was a rather sordid tale in my party days about a bachelorette gone awry. I had overindulged in some electric jello shooters and had been sent home from the pub early. But when the girls tried to awaken me from my drunken slumber in the wee hours of the morning (so I could buzz them up into the flat ) I wanted no part of being woken up, thank you very much.

Nor could I seem to find out which button to push on the silly intercom to allow them in the foyer.

Unfortunately, my repeated wails of”I can’t” (in the most whining and pathetic tone imaginable) was recorded on the answering machine. Much to my chagrin, the women played the tape back to me the next morning.

But to this day, I can still hear how dreadful I sounded!

Anyhow, in the next part of my presentation, I told the story of this conversation I’d had with my husband the day before he died. I’d said to him:”I am so scared I am going to wake up 20 years from now and not have completed Riviera Beach Raccoon Removal.”

To which he’d responded:”You’re probably right about that… just as long as you know that will have been your decision.”

But in all fairness, after 12 years of being together, I believe the poor man had run out of patience listening to me whine and whine about not having the money or time to write. For at least a decade, I had used every excuse in the book as to why I could not make my writing a priority.

“I’ll show him!” I promised myself I would wake up early the next morning and do an hour of writing before going into work at my clerical job.

I pushed snooze. “I can’t get up,” I told myself (in a whiny, pathetic voice). “I’m too tired to write.”

When I finally hauled my butt out of bed, after pushing the snooze button multiple times, there wasn’t any time to write. In actuality, there was barely time for me to get to work.

And when I did arrive at work, my whole life changed in an instant. John died that afternoon. And I got the wake-up call of all wake-up calls about the danger of waiting for a tragedy to awaken us to the importance of achieving our dreams.

Two weeks after his departure, I started writing what would become my novel, A Widow’s Awakening. It took me 8 years to get it – and me where it had to be. However, I did it.

After I completed my presentation at the women’s media event, we had an impromptu Q&A, and the host asked me this question:

“If there was only one word to describe what you think is the most crucial thing in terms of transforming”I can’t” into”I could,” what could it be?”

I thought about this for a moment and then a single word popped into my mind.

“Faith,” I heard myself say to the group. “But not religion in the traditional way we often think about religion, as in having faith in some type of divine guidance or a religious belief.”

“I’m talking about faith in your self.” I continued. “I think it’s absolutely imperative that we have faith in ourselves and our ability to achieve what it is we really want to achieve. Because if we don’t have that, then all of the divine help and spiritual guidance in the world can not help us.”

Likewise with our mortal supporters.

John believed in my potential as a writer and did what he could to inspire me to take concrete actions towards meeting my goals i.e. get my butt in the seat and WRITE.

But in the end of the day, taking action was my duty. That was a really tough life lesson to learn in the aftermath of such an immense loss.

If we do not have faith in ourselves that we can – and will – measure up to the plate, each and every day, and do the job that needs to be done, then the reinforcement and support of our nearest and dearest, in addition to any type of divine guidance we may think is available to us, will not be of much use.

And for the record, I DO believe there is a tremendous amount of spiritual aid just waiting in the wings to help guide us… sending us all sorts of signs and signals. We just have to a) listen and b) take action. I suspect, however, that those other forces do not require our faith.